Loving, learning

We want love to be this spectacular, wonderful thing. And sometimes it is. But what if it's not? What if it's one-sided, or forbidden, or misunderstood?

Unfortunately, I think that is the case a lot of the time. 

So why do those people just keep on loving? Because, as Tennyson says, "It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." 

Humans need to feel. It is in our nature to pick someone we think will make us happy and latch on. Why do you think love causes a wider range of emotions than pretty much any other thing or idea? Because it's important. We need it. So when we find someone we feel something for, we're hard-pressed to give them up, even when the odds are against us.

There's a song by the band Yes that goes: "owner of a lonely heart-- much better than an owner of a broken heart." Honestly, I don't think that's true. My roommates and I have talked about this, and they agree that even though they might have had their hearts broken, they still don't regret falling in love. It's because you learn so much when you put your heart on the line, and it just feels so real and good, even when that love might end up damaged or broken. "To love another person is to see the face of God" --Les Mis. Truly, our lives are shaped by those we love and those we don't, and those who love us and those who don't. 

I love a lot of people, but I don't think I've ever truly been in love. Sure, I  like this one guy a whole lot, but am I in love with him? What is love? (baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more) My understanding of it is that you truly love someone when their happiness is more important than your own. You think only of serving them and making them feel better. That's why mutual love works so well; the one takes care of the other, and vice versa. You can't mess around with this love business, it's dang important.

Just to be clear, I don't claim to have all the answers on this subject; in fact, when it comes to love, I am like a 6th grade violinist trying to play along with the Berlin Philharmonic. Essentially, I really don't know anything. This is all speculation and philosophy based on my minimal experience and the experiences of others.

But yeah, so those are some of the things I've been thinking about lately. 

"That's the thing about love-- it's not about deserving it or not. It just is." --Erin, roommate extraordinaire